donnaimmaculata ([personal profile] donnaimmaculata) wrote2008-08-06 01:28 pm

Teh Sparkly

Everything I know about Twilight I have learned from my flist, and I know that I will never, ever read the books. I never intended to waste any words on them, either, but I would like some confirmation that what I've now read is true:

Bella gives birth to Edmund's Sparkly!Vampire!Magical!WerewolfSoulmate!Baby and the following things happen in the process:

a) she pukes blood
b) the Sparkly!Vampire!Magical!WerewolfSoulmate!Baby breaks her pelvis and her spine
c) Edmund uses his awesome sparkly marble teeth to bite the Sparkly!Vampire!Magical!WerewolfSoulmate!Baby free from the womb

Really? I mean, seriously? Because if so, then this is the most beautiful cracky squick ever, and I am seriously impressed with SMeyer. I would have never dared to put anything like that into a novel I intend to be published and read by children.

Then again, I am not a romantic :-(

[identity profile] rosina-alcona.livejournal.com 2008-08-06 03:09 pm (UTC)(link)
I think the werewolve who's in love with her (who then imprints on her baby, because that isn't weird) is narrating that particular passage.

But the werewolf does some chapters and Bella does the rest. I think.

[identity profile] donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com 2008-08-06 03:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Shame. I think Bella should narrate the birth scene.

SMeyer took the whole werewolves-mate-for-life scenario to a whole new level, didn't she?