donnaimmaculata (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
donnaimmaculata) wrote2004-07-14 05:45 pm
donnaimmaculata) wrote2004-07-14 05:45 pm
Genesis, Part II
Title: Genesis
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Fluff. Kisses. Butter crumpets.
Word count: 16,829
Summary: Bill goes werewolf hunting
Disclaimer: Not my characters. If they were, Bill wouldn't have mysteriously disappeared from OotP after the first half of the novel
A/N: With many thanks for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
babycakesin, whose comments made me not only laugh, but also feel that I had done the right thing.
Part I is here
VII.
The news of the murders reached him in the wee hours of the morning. By that time, he had got used to news of death arriving at all times of day and night, but it didn't mean it had become easier to bear. Between extra shifts at the bank and Order duties, he had barely slept in days and his exhausted body cried out at the injustice of it when he forced it into submission and began to dress. His muscles ached, his head spun and tiredness prickled under his eyelids when he Apparated by the smoking remainders of what had used to be the Joneses' house. It took him a few seconds to get his breath back. He then walked slowly towards the debris, dodging elaborate curse traps on his way almost blindly. In the course of the past months, he had gained the reputation as the curse expert, which was less due to the fact that he was really so much better than any of the Ministry professionals, but more due to sheer coincidence that You-Know-Who happened to have acquired a taste in that particular brand of Dark curses Bill was specialised in breaking.
He could see a group of Aurors moving at a distance, carefully trying to avoid any lingering traces of Dark magic. There have been many losses among Aurors when, rather than killing their victims directly, You-Know-Who and his supporters had begun putting curses on their houses, which would go off unexpectedly, triggered by certain words or objects. The method resembled very much the one the ancient Egyptians used to use to protect their pyramids, and dealing with it was second nature to Bill. Others were not so lucky.
A man detached himself from the group, making towards Bill, who recognised the tall figure and broad shoulders of Kingsley Shacklebolt. The Auror looked grave, and also rather sad, when he gave Bill a brief account on what had happened. The attack had not been entirely unexpected, as the Joneses had always been very outspoken against You-Know-Who, but nothing could have been done to prevent it. "...Hestia arrived barely moments after the curses had set off," Kingsley finished. "She was lucky, I suppose. But her family-" he broke off with a sigh. "There was nothing we could do for them. Now the only thing left is to decontaminate the area and deal with the Muggle witnesses."
"Where is Hestia now?" Bill asked, scanning the surrounding carefully. He could feel the power of the lingering curses, and he was fairly sure he could figure them out. Several years spent in the Egyptian tombs had given him an unerring instinct for the structure of elaborate curse systems and he knew where to look for the sources.
"Lupin took her back to Headquarters," said Kingsley. "He knows what to do."
Bill nodded. Remus was good at dealing with those suffering from shock. It was a knack, Bill supposed. He wondered, vaguely, whether Remus had refined the ability due to experiencing so many losses himself.
The idea was still on his mind when he arrived at Grimmauld Place hours later. The Joneses' estate had been cleaned and sealed, and the Muggle neighbourhood had been combed though for possible witnesses. Bill could hardly keep himself upright with tiredness, but he didn't feel like going back to his own flat. If he was perfectly honest, he wanted to see Remus. And, if he was perfectly, perfectly honest, he wanted to make sure that Remus' offering comfort to Hestia hadn't involved sex.
That idea had begun forming in his mind a few days after the tea time fuck. Bill was no stranger to sexual exploits of all kinds, and he knew that having fucked someone didn't necessarily lead to a better understanding, closer friendship, a relationship or, plainly, more fucking, but it was nagging at him that he so completely couldn't make out Remus' thoughts on that subject. Remus was in no way different that he had been before, showed neither an increased interest nor consciousness nor pointed indifference. In Bill's (not inconsiderable) experience, people's behaviour always changed subtly after they'd had sex; they would behave either more awkwardly or more openly, exchange embarrassed or conspiratorial looks, show a reaction, any reaction. Not so Remus. His behaviour towards Bill was as polite and friendly as ever, and it grated on Bill's nerves. Especially when combined with the lasting memory of Remus and Tonks in the library, back then in October. He hadn't minded it then, and he didn't really mind it now (he could understand their motives well enough), but he could not stop suspecting that Remus had slept his way through the entire Order and that he, Bill, was merely one of many who had been offered that particular form of comfort.
The house was dark and very still. A single gas lamp lit the dim hall, and Bill checked the kitchen first, before directing his steps upstairs. He had no idea what he wanted to do; the thought of invading Remus' privacy was appalling, and he was hoping to stumble across a solution of sorts that would prevent him from exposing himself as a jealous stalker. Especially since he wasn't jealous, not as such. He merely wanted to be sure.
The door to the library stood ajar and the soft crackling of a fire stopped Bill in his steps. He peered inside.
Remus was sprawled in an old squashy armchair, his legs stretched out in front of him, his robe unbuttoned and the collar of his shirt open. His head leaned back against the back of the chair, and Bill's eyes lingered for a moment at the long curve of his throat. The sharp light of the morning sun fell onto him through the tall windows, illuminating his thin face. Bill could see the dark shadow of stubble on his chin, which looked slightly odd, seeing as he had never seen Remus other than clean-shaven before. His arm hung loosely down, the fingers of his hand wrapped around a tumbler of whisky. While Bill was still trying to arrange the different emotions passing through him, Remus' eyes fell open and he looked directly at Bill.
"Good morning," said Remus hoarsely.
"Morning." Bill took one step into the room, and then another one. Remus was watching him approach, his face blank, his posture unchanged. Bill nodded towards the bottle sitting on the table beside Remus. "Mind if I have one, too?"
"Help yourself." Remus didn't move, but as Bill poured himself a glass of Firewhisky, he said with a smile that twisted his mouth but didn't affect his eyes, "Isn't it too early for you to be drinking?"
Bill shrugged, knocked down the drink, put the glass back and sat down on the table. "You're drinking."
"Ah, yes, But I'm... older." Bill knew that that wasn't what Remus had wanted to say. He didn't mind. That conversation was important, and he didn't want to fuck it up right from the start by being too assertive.
"That's why you started drinking earlier," he pointed out. Remus smiled, as though in spite of himself.
"Bill Weasley," he said. "What a quick tongue you've got."
"You know I have," said Bill. He didn't mean it as an innuendo, but there was a sudden flash in Remus' eyes, and, Bill thought, for a moment he looked very much as though he would plunge himself at Bill, but the flash was gone in the next second, replaced by the usual composure.
"I do," said Remus, taking a sip of his whisky. Bill waited patiently, watching dust rise from the shelves and dance in the sunlight.
"What do you want?" Remus asked at last. He had put his glass back at the table, which Bill thought was a good sign.
"Inquire after Hestia," said Bill. "How is she?"
"Sleeping."
"Did you sleep with her?" asked Bill. Remus gave a strangled half-laugh and stretched himself out, positively lounging in the dusty armchair.
"Is that it, Bill? The question everything comes down to?"
"Of course not." Bill shrugged again. "But it's the easiest one to ask." He saw something flash in Remus' eyes again and knew the man hadn't been expecting this. Remus was good at that game, but so was Bill, and he knew that Remus appreciated it.
"I didn't," Remus said calmly. "Would it make any difference if I did?"
"A difference to what?" Bill asked. Remus smiled again, knowingly, and Bill felt found out. Answering a question with a question implied insecurity. He ploughed on. "A difference in my attitude towards you?" And as Remus half-shrugged, he said, almost angrily, "Do you really think I would be offended just because you make your own decisions as to what you do in your spare time?" Remus smirked at the phrasing and, feeling increasingly awkward and hating himself for it, Bill added, "I know you've slept with Tonks. And I'm pretty sure you've slept with Snape - though only God knows why - and I couldn't care less about what you do or don't with any of them. I do however care, very much, about your attitude towards me."
"Meaning what?" Remus had shifted in his chair, and if he hadn't been so angry, Bill would have felt proud about having forced the man with his back against the wall.
"Meaning that I'm not interested in being a pity fuck," said Bill in a very low and very clear voice. "I don't need you to provide... healing buttsex to comfort me. You want to shag me? Fine. But for fuck's sake, don't do it because you feel you've got to make me feel better or anything."
"I don't want to make you feel better," said Remus after a pause. "I want to make you feel good."
All of a sudden, Bill was feeling hot again, but also cold and shivering and helpless, and he decided that it had been a bad idea to drink the whisky after all, because his head had got all fuzzy and was spinning, and there was a weird, reeling sensation somewhere in the depth of his stomach.
"Good," he said, feeling lame and silly. He was looking down on his hand that rested on the table beside his thigh and remembered his urgent wish to see it splayed against Remus' skin. When he looked up, expecting to see Remus' gaze fixed on him, he saw that the other man was looking down likewise, as though avoiding meeting his eyes.
"You're right," Bill said, "I shouldn't have drunk that whisky."
Remus lifted his head to meet Bill's eyes. "Are you unwell?"
"Just tired, I suppose. And drunk." He stood up shakily. "You're a bad influence, Lupin."
Remus stood also, much more gracefully than Bill. He seemed to have full control over his limbs. "You can sleep here. If you like."
"Okay," Bill said. "Thanks." They stood there for a moment, motionless and merely looking at each other across the distance of a few feet. "Which room?"
Remus blinked, once. "Whichever you like."
"Okay." Bill nodded. "Okay."
*~*
When he woke up hours later, darkness was falling outside the windows. He felt relaxed and better rested than he had been in a long time. Little wonder, as he'd just had the longest sleep in what seemed like ages. The room was dim and warm, and it smelled good. It smelled of Remus. Carefully, Bill turned his head and stared at the sleeping man beside him. Remus was curled up on his side, his back to Bill, and was breathing deeply and steadily. Bill could see one bony shoulder, the skin dusted with a smattering of pale brown freckles. The sight of the freckles made him smile; he remembered how he had always hated his, as a child, and how he had learned to grudgingly accept them, as an adult, unable to believe that anyone could honestly find them sexy. But now, watching Remus' freckled skin, he thought he had never seen anything so alluring in his whole life.
He felt especially gratified on seeing that Remus had not bothered dressing for bed. They had taken turns in the bathroom that morning, and when Remus had come to bed, Bill had already been asleep; too many sleepless nights had taken their toll. He snaked his hand towards Remus until it encountered warm skin and moved it down Remus' back. Ah, so Remus did put on his pyjama bottoms after all.
Grinning, Bill rose from the bed and pulled on his robe. It was time for another tea time.
When Bill returned with a tray laden with tea things and sandwiches, Remus was sitting in the armchair by the window, reading. He nodded towards the tray.
"Your mother?"
"Nope." Bill put the tray down onto Remus' bedside table. "I am fully capable of preparing tea and, if I'm particularly inspired, even to make sandwiches."
"I'm sure you are," said Remus, handing Bill the scroll with a sigh. Bill frowned.
"What is this?"
"Kingsley's report." Remus reached for a sandwich and Bill was momentarily distracted by the sight of muscles rippling beneath the skin of Remus' shoulder. He sat down at the edge of the bed and unrolled the scroll slowly, feeling guilty already. The words held no importance for him, not here and now, not when he would have rather drunk his tea and enjoyed the conversation with Remus, before throwing him onto the bed to shag him rotten. He was aware that what Kingsley had to say was more important than his own hormonal urges, but he didn't feel it, and it irritated him.
"Hestia's at the Ministry, then," he said after he had finished reading. "That accounts for the house's being empty." He took up a cup of tea with a sigh, drank too hastily and burned his tongue. He put it back down with a grimace. "I better get going, too," Bill said reluctantly.
Remus handed him another piece of parchment.
"Kingsley slipped in a note of a more... personal character," he said. "Read it."
Lupin,
Don't you dare leave the house tonight, unless it's on fire. You need to rest once in a while and now would be a good time.
Tell the same to Tonks and Weasley, should you see them. Send them home and to bed; they'll listen to you.
Kingsley.
"What a lovely caring man he is," Bill muttered. "All tenderness and affection." He let himself flop back onto the bed, his robe falling open.
"You wouldn't dare disobey a direct order, would you, Weasley?"
"Not if the order is as welcome as this one," said Bill, blinking up at the ceiling. "I think I'm in love with Auror Shacklebolt," he announced seriously. Tomorrow, the realisation of what had happened would strike and he would be back in the throes of war. But tonight, Bill was determined to push away all thoughts of death and destruction and remain lying on his back, staring up at the ceiling, as long as Remus would let him.
The aged armchair groaned as Remus rose from it. He stepped over to the bed, where he remained looming over Bill. The light of a single candle wasn't sufficient to illuminate his face, which remained in shadow, but Bill could see that Remus must have shaved while he had been in the kitchen, making sandwiches and tea. Bill grinned.
"What?" asked Remus.
"You've shaved," said Bill.
"Yes. So have you." Remus' eyes travelled along Bill's exposed body, stretched out shamelessly across the bed, his legs spread out untidily. Bill could feel that gaze burn when it passed his crotch. His cock twitched in the confines of his pants.
Remus was hard, too, Bill could distinctly make out his erection under the thin material of the pyjama trousers which hung low on his hips. A wet spot indicated where the head of Remus' cock pressed against the fabric.
"You look good," said Bill.
Remus laughed. "Hm. That's nice of you to say, Weasley. You don't happen to have any ulterior motives when complementing me?"
"Ulterior? No," said Bill, fully hard now and very aware of it. "Quite superior, actually. Pure, really."
"Transparent," said Remus, staring pointedly at Bill's crotch. When he followed his gaze, Bill saw that the white material didn't do anything to cover his very dark, very swollen cock.
"So," said Bill.
"So."
"There's still something I want to do, you know." Bill didn't know how long he would keep it up. His voice was already betraying him, dropped impossibly low, and he had difficulties forcing his dry lips and tongue around the words.
"Tell me."
"I want to touch you," Bill said. "I want to see my hands against your skin."
"All right." Remus exhaled shakily and then moved over, kneeling on the edge of the bed. One hand came to rest beside Bill's ribs, almost but not quite touching, and the other toyed with Bill's hair, fanned out around his head. "Touch me."
And so Bill did. With a throaty moan, he gripped Remus around the waist and pulled him down onto himself, relishing the way the man's hard body crushed him into the mattress. The skin of Remus' back and sides was cool to the touch, but where he rubbed against Bill, Bill's chest and stomach, he was scorching hot. One hand entangled into Bill's hair, Remus held his head in place, kissing him wildly and desperately, feeding him his tongue and sucking in Bill's in return, and when he opened his mouth a bit more, their teeth clacked together.
Bill was anchored to reality by a few hot spots erupting all over his body: his mouth, burning with Remus' taste, his stomach, where waves of pleasure were blossoming, his cock, ramrod hard and trapped in the hollow between Remus' hip and thigh. Never breaking the kiss, Remus shifted on top of Bill, rolling his hips until their cocks made contact, and Bill could have sworn he felt a magical shock spark through him. He hooked one leg around Remus, and Remus gasped and gasped again when Bill slid his foot between his thighs. It was probably the hottest, most erotic sound he'd ever heard, and he disentangled his hand from Remus' hair and cupped his arse instead. This time, Remus positively groaned, and he bit Bill's lip very hard, before he started grinding himself against Bill. "Like that, do you?" Bill muttered, startling at the sound of his own voice. Instead of an answer, Remus let go of his mouth and began licking a moist trail from his lips down to his jaw, where he bit down, and further down Bill's throat. Moaning so heavily he felt on the brink of hyperventilating, Bill turned his head and arched his throat into Remus' mouth. Remus' hand, still entangled in his hair, was suddenly within the reach of Bill's mouth. His tongue darted out to lap at Remus' fingers, which quivered, and Bill stretched his neck a fraction to suck in Remus index finger. It was damp and salty, and Bill used his tongue to shift the finger into the right position inside his mouth, to push it between his teeth. Remus made a growling sound deep in his throat.
For a brief moment, Remus' weight was lifted from Bill, and he used the opportunity to get his breath back. But in the next second, his breath was knocked out of him again as long, deft fingers curled around his cock and pulled. Bill cried out and bit down on the finger in his mouth. He was rewarded by a sharp intake of breath.
Contrary to what he would have expected, Remus' hand on his cock did not make him incoherent but rather jolted him back to his senses. Bill opened his eyes and fluttered his eyelids to free his lashes from a few stray hairs that clung to them. With a soft chuckle, Remus wiped Bill's hair from his face. "You look completely wild," he said, his voice so thick and heavy it reverberated through Bill's body like the thrumming of the bass drum in a Weird Sisters song.
"You look completely debauched," said Bill, taking in Remus' darkened eyes and his kiss-swollen lips. Remus hair hung in his face, swaying gently with each rolling motion of his hips as he continued grinding himself against Bill's groin. Bill bucked his hips in a wordless attempt to urge Remus on, whose hand had never ceased its stroking motion along Bill's cock.
"You're very hot," said Remus, flicking his thumb over the head of Bill's cock.
"You've no idea." Bill said and gasped at the contact of Remus' rough skin against his most sensitive flesh.
"Want me to go on?" Remus accompanied the question with a very pronounced pull on Bill's cock, who gasped again, clutching Remus' shoulders. Closing his eyes for a moment, Bill gave in to the sensation, feeling heat flooding over him in waves as his balls contracted and his skin began to tingle.
"No," he said at last. "Stop."
Remus let go obediently, and Bill flexed his muscles to flip them both over and stretched out atop of Remus. "Did you vanish my pants?" he asked as realisation dawned. Remus merely smirked. Bill leaned in and licked his lips until the smug smile faded and Remus moaned, hotly, into Bill's mouth. "That's better," said Bill and lowered his head.
"I want to lick you," said Bill, later, after having kissed and sucked his way along Remus' body. His mouth felt slick with semen and saliva.
Remus opened his eyes lazily. "I believe you have just licked me, and very thoroughly at that." Bill could see the pulse point at his throat, the rapid beat flattening even as Remus was speaking, and he pressed his thumb against the hollow at the base of Remus' throat. It was sticky with sweat.
"I want to lick you more." Remus didn't answer. His hand toyed with Bill's hair that fanned out across Remus' chest. Bill waited, patiently, while his heartbeat evened out slowly.
"You've just come all over me," said Remus. "You can hardly want to lick me clean."
Bill flashed a grin. "I don't." He planted a heated kiss on Remus' lips and sat back on his heels. "Turn over," he said, gripping Remus' hip with one hand.
Remus opened his mouth, thought better of it and rolled onto his stomach. Bill sighed at the sight of the long, pale back, gently curved and tapering into narrow hips. He smoothed his palm down Remus' spine, turned his hand over and grazed his knuckles across Remus' tailbone. There was a faint silvery scar at the small of Remus' back, which Bill brushed lightly, before moving his hand further down. He felt Remus shudder as he cupped his arse with one hand, and felt him moan when he swiped his tongue from the small of his back to his shoulder blades.
When he dipped his finger into the cleft of Remus' arse, however, the man tensed ever so slightly, just as he had done before when Bill had tried to insert his finger whilst sucking Remus off. Yet Bill was determined. Wanking Remus and sucking Remus had been exhilarating, but the idea of rimming Remus and fucking Remus made him positively light-headed with lust. Damn the man's trust issues. Bill didn't think he would be able to leave that arse alone.
It wasn't until he had licked Remus' back, the curve of his arse, the insides of his thighs, had left tiny bites along the length of his flanks, that Remus began writhing beneath him, begging, actually begging for more. Bill was hard again, had been hard for what seemed like hours, and his hands were trembling with the effort of holding himself back. His legs were trembling also, feeling as though legions of insects were crawling slowly through his veins, tickling him from the inside, hollowing him. With a sigh, Bill pushed his face between Remus' legs and lapped at his balls from behind. The effect was immediate; Remus came up from the bed with a strangled cry. Bill choked with lust, and when he dived in again, he went straight for the tender flesh in the cleft of Remus' arse. Remus gave a violent jerk and said something unintelligible into the pillow, but he didn't pull back from Bill's tongue which swiped along his cleft very slowly and thoroughly.
His hands clasped around Remus' hips, Bill could feel each shudder that shook the man's body and, growing bolder, he coaxed his hips up a bit to ease access. He tasted sweat, and a sharp taste that prickled on his tongue and went straight to his head, like liquor, and when he dipped the tip of his tongue into Remus, he heard the man give a keening sound which was so entirely unexpected, so unlike Remus, that it almost undid Bill on the spot. He pulled back, panting, until he regained control.
Remus' back was arched and he was trembling; sweat was running down his back, and Bill licked off the drops pooling between his shoulder blades and in the small of his back. He only realised that he was moaning when he saw his heavy breaths stir the hairs in the nape of Remus' neck. Remus exhaled deeply and raised his hips so that Bill's cock came to rest against the curve of his arse. The sight made his head spin, and Bill rubbed himself against the proffered flesh, slid the whole length of his cock along Remus' cleft, saw its glistening head push against Remus' opening and let go of his cock abruptly to push his fingers inside Remus. Holding Remus' hip in a bruising grip, he urged him up to better watch his fingers disappear inside the man's body. Remus' back heaved with breaths that threatened to burst his lungs. He cried out when Bill curled his fingers to hit his prostate.
"Fuck," Bill panted, "fuck." And, a few thrusts later, "Do you have anything?"
"Drawer," Remus managed, and, "Christ!" he added when Bill forced another finger inside him, twisting them to loosen Remus as much as possible.
"Good?" Bill asked, groping around blindly in the nightstand drawer.
"Please."
The slickness of the salve seemed to make his cock swell, and it tingled in his hand as he guided it into Remus, slipping easily past the generously slicked muscle, which tightened around him even as he pushed inside. Bill paused for a moment, giving Remus time to adjust and himself to stabilise his breathing. He didn't think Hieroglyphs boring enough existed that could help him stop himself from coming after merely a few thrusts. But Remus certainly seemed very close, too, and Bill decided that he wouldn't restrain himself and go for a good hard fuck instead. Not that he had a great chance to make it last in any case, not when Remus was shuddering under him, his hands clenching in the duvet, and not when the tight grip around his cock was pulling his orgasm out of him with even the slightest movement he made.
He scrambled into a better position, drew back and pushed back inside, hard, so that his balls slapped against Remus' thighs. Remus groaned and pushed back. Bill shifted to change the angle and this time, his thrust hit right against the spot inside Remus that made him cry out incoherently. Bill wiped off sweat that was running down his forehead and into his eyes. "Can you come from this?" he asked. Remus gave a shuddering snort of laughter.
"Are you kidding?" he said, turning his head slightly so that Bill could see his profile. "How could I not?"
Bill lunged forward, trapping Remus' lips in a messy kiss, stealing his breath. "All right," he said, pulling back. His hands closed around Remus' hips again. "All right."
His orgasm seemed to be torn from the very marrow of his bones, which went liquid the moment his cock emptied itself inside Remus, and Bill crushed down onto the other man's back. Remus, trembling in the aftermath of his own climax, arched back into Bill. Bill closed his arms around him, feeling strangely protective, planted a hot kiss onto the nape of his neck and drifted off to sleep.
He woke up with his mouth dry and his skin itching with sweat and spunk. Remus was lying on his back beside him, looking up at the ceiling, and he turned his head to look at Bill when he felt him stir.
Bill's breath caught at the sight of Remus' flushed face and reddened mouth, and he trailed his fingers gingerly over the man's lips, which curved up in a smile.
"I-" said Bill and coughed.
"There's water." Remus pointed at the table. God, his voice was rough, Bill thought. Almost enough to make him hard all over again.
"You should have woken me up," Bill said when he felt he had regained enough control over his mouth again. Something felt not quite right, however, and, frowning, he raised his fingers to his own mouth and traced his lips.
"Anything wrong?"
"My lips are throbbing," said Bill in wonderment. Remus smiled.
"Mmh." He turned onto his side, facing Bill. "Your mouth looks beautiful."
"You should have woken me up," Bill repeated, and laid one hand over Remus'.
"You need your sleep," Remus shrugged.
"Hm. Yes." Bill fell silent. For a few minutes, he was quite content watching his hand play with Remus', their fingers twining and disentwining, but eventually, he couldn't ignore the worrying thoughts surfacing from the depth of his consciousness and nagging at him.
"What is it?" asked Remus quietly. Bill let go of his hand and turned onto his back with a sigh.
"Hestia," he said. "Her family." He stared at the ceiling for a moment, sighed again, and added, "But that's only the tip of the iceberg, of course. I feel as though we're not doing enough, as though I'm not doing enough. A war is raging, people are dying, and still, I'm lying here, with you, quite comfortable, and quite happy to ignore all the tragedies happening all around me."
Remus, too, rolled onto his back. "You can't think of it all the time," he said calmly. "You need to take a break from time to time."
"I know," Bill said, beginning to feel stupid. Remus had lost much more than he had, and Remus was not going to pieces on him. Then again, he, Bill, had much more left to lose, and the thought frightened him. "I know that I can't. But, you know, I feel as though I'm not committed enough. As though I'm only fooling around, not contributing anything vital."
"You know of course that this is ridiculous. You are contributing-" Remus began, but Bill talked over him.
"Yeah, sure, I do provide some know-how, but. It's only a technical thing. You know? It's not as though I felt any pain. It's not as-" he hesitated and then ploughed on, "it's not as though I have suffered, really, really suffered. I mean, what do I know? Last night, I was pissed off because I was called on duty when I had rather slept. I am irritated because I am no longer in Egypt, enjoying my job and, er, enjoying myself, but have to comb through damp and cold remainders of houses of people who have been killed by You-Know-Who. I know that what I'm doing here is more important than going looking for treasure for the goblins. But I'd rather not be here, and it annoys me. Sorry to bother you with this," he said, rolling onto his side again and giving Remus a faint grin. "I guess I'm just not dedicated enough. I lack the fierce enthusiasm some people have. I'm not Mad-Eye."
"Believe me, I'm glad you aren't. And there is a difference between fierce enthusiasm and single-minded fanaticism," said Remus, grinning likewise. "Fierce enthusiasm, that would be Sirius."
There hadn't been many occasions on which Bill had ever heard Remus mention Sirius. The topic wasn't taboo, but Remus didn't seek it, either, and Bill understood his reserve. He wasn't quite sure just how close these two had been. Oh, he had heard the rumours and the gossip, but he didn't think it was any of his business. If he was honest, he would admit that he was glad Remus didn't want to talk about Sirius, because he wouldn't really know what to say. The eldest brother of half a dozen younger siblings and a people person by nature, he was reasonably good at offering comfort and advice within a certain range. However, he felt he was badly equipped for comforting those whose lives had been substantially shattered and who were facing the shards of their existence. He couldn't even say, 'I know how you feel,' because he didn't. He was alive and well and so, miraculously, was his family.
All those thoughts swirled around in his head, but before he could voice any of them, Remus continued talking.
"You don't have to feel what others feel to be valuable for the Order. The fact alone that you have left Egypt and come back to England shows that you do care."
"I don't think I care enough, though," said Bill. "Most of the time, I'd rather run and never come back."
"So would we all."
"Yeah, but I'd rather run for the wrong reasons. I think." He chewed at a strand of his hair, stared into the darkness and said, "I don't think I'm afraid to die. I am afraid to lose."
"When I was twenty-one," Remus said, "I was consumed by guilt about being the one who was still alive." He gripped Bill's hand and pulled it closer. "It'll fade. You survive and life goes on, poor comfort that it is. There will be losses, and you will lose someone, sooner or later. But you'll survive that as well."
"Unless I won't."
"Unless you won't. In which case we will miss you and mourn you, and move on eventually."
"I really don't know why the girls are all mad about you," said Bill. "You are a wretched comforter, when you think about it."
"Ah, yes. It might be not comfort they seek."
"Careful, mate, my mother is one of 'the girls'."
Laughing softly, Remus rolled onto his front and shifted closer. He laid his arm around Bill's waist, splaying his fingers over his back. Bill leaned in into the warmth. When Remus kissed him, he thought he could distinguish traces of the same taste that had driven him mad while he was sucking Remus and licking Remus and he wondered, briefly, how it was possible for his senses to be still full of Remus and whether it was because Remus' scent had settled in layers all over his skin, filling his nostrils and teasing his taste buds.
"Will you miss me?" Bill asked when they came up for air. He had pushed Remus back onto the pillow, and his hair was hanging down like a long, red curtain, enveloping Remus' face. Remus smiled and wrapped one long strand around his finger.
"Where are you going?"
Under any other circumstances, Bill would not have tried to take that conversation further. But time had become valuable. Tomorrow was uncertain, and his fear of loss included the fear of missing chances. He knew Remus liked him, and he wanted to have something to hold on to in the moment the world collapsed.
"I don't mean to be - you know..." Bill said.
"Eloquent?" Remus supplied, the corners of his mouth twitching.
Bill flashed a brief grin. He shifted and tossed his hair back. Remus was watching him with lazy eyes. Bill raised one shoulder in a half-shrug.
"I guess I just want to know whether..." he paused, looking down at Remus, his head tilted. "How deep this runs, really."
"You've just had your cock up my arse," said Remus lightly. "I'd say that's pretty deep."
"Not to forget my tongue." Bill nodded. "I've had my tongue up your arse as well." He watched the other man for a moment and said, just as lightly, "So that's what this is all about? Cock and tongue?"
Remus blinked and shifted. "Bill," he said.
"That's okay, you know," Bill cut in. "I'm not- I'd only like to know." He turned around and reached for the nightstand. "Want some water?"
Remus took the offered glass automatically. "Bill." He pushed himself upright, propped up on his elbow. "It's just... I am not-" he paused, looking bewildered.
"Eloquent?" Bill smirked. Remus smiled weakly. "It's okay. You don't owe me anything. But, you know," he shrugged. "We are in the middle of a war. I could be dead tomorrow. You could be dead tomorrow." He turned his head to face Remus, watching him intently. "I don't want to miss a chance, if this is what it is."
"I see," said Remus.
"Good." Bill fell back onto the pillow and closed his eyes. "God, I really need to sleep," he muttered. "Unless you'd like to shag some more, in which case I'll be happy to oblige."
"Hm. Maybe not."
"Okay."
"I think I'll just suck you off."
"If that's what you like."
"Very much so."
His eyes still closed, Bill smiled and then sighed when he felt Remus' hand on his chest.
"We can still shag, some time," said Remus against Bill's navel, his breath tickling the fine hairs there.
"Later?"
"Yes."
"Tomorrow?"
"Yes."
"Next week?"
"Yes."
"Can I top?"
"Ye-" Remus broke off and laughed, sending warm puffs of breath towards Bill's - painfully hard - cock. "Perhaps."
"You - ah! - liked it," said Bill, arching up into the heat that had just engulfed him.
"Yes." Remus' voice was rather muffled. "But-" he sank all the way down and pulled back up, trailing the flat of his tongue along the sensitive underside of Bill's cock, "I also rather like being in there."
Bill gasped and pushed down onto the finger. "Be my guest," he said thickly. "Now?"
Remus hoisted himself up and stretched out alongside Bill, his finger still buried up Bill's arse. Bill lifted his head to watch Remus' hand working between his legs, but Remus gripped his hair, forcing Bill to tilt his head towards him. "I don't think so," he said, kissing Bill deeply, luxuriously, lapping at the inside of his mouth until Bill gasped and clung to him. "I'll have you come first." He let go of Bill's hair, and Bill fell back, panting.
"Okay," he said. "Good plan."
"Don't think you're a bit greedy, do you?" Remus was moving his finger inside him very slowly, almost tenderly, as though trying to explore Bill as thoroughly as possible.
"It was your idea." Bill nudged Remus' flank with his knee, until the man was lying between his open legs, their cocks pressed against each other, Remus' weight crushing him quite deliciously. He pulled Remus down into another kiss, relishing the feeling of Remus' cock twitching against his when they opened their mouths for each other. "Besides, it was you who seduced me. You're responsible for me now."
"I didn't see you put up a fight."
"I'm not stupid enough to waste such an opportunity." Bill moaned. Remus' finger was moving inside him again. When he opened his eyes, he saw Remus look at him with an expression of utmost concentration on his face. "What?"
"You might regret it one day," Remus whispered.
"I might. It's worth it."
"All right." Remus kissed him again. "Let's give it a shot then."
The End
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Fluff. Kisses. Butter crumpets.
Word count: 16,829
Summary: Bill goes werewolf hunting
Disclaimer: Not my characters. If they were, Bill wouldn't have mysteriously disappeared from OotP after the first half of the novel
A/N: With many thanks for
babycakesin, whose comments made me not only laugh, but also feel that I had done the right thing.Part I is here
VII.
The news of the murders reached him in the wee hours of the morning. By that time, he had got used to news of death arriving at all times of day and night, but it didn't mean it had become easier to bear. Between extra shifts at the bank and Order duties, he had barely slept in days and his exhausted body cried out at the injustice of it when he forced it into submission and began to dress. His muscles ached, his head spun and tiredness prickled under his eyelids when he Apparated by the smoking remainders of what had used to be the Joneses' house. It took him a few seconds to get his breath back. He then walked slowly towards the debris, dodging elaborate curse traps on his way almost blindly. In the course of the past months, he had gained the reputation as the curse expert, which was less due to the fact that he was really so much better than any of the Ministry professionals, but more due to sheer coincidence that You-Know-Who happened to have acquired a taste in that particular brand of Dark curses Bill was specialised in breaking.
He could see a group of Aurors moving at a distance, carefully trying to avoid any lingering traces of Dark magic. There have been many losses among Aurors when, rather than killing their victims directly, You-Know-Who and his supporters had begun putting curses on their houses, which would go off unexpectedly, triggered by certain words or objects. The method resembled very much the one the ancient Egyptians used to use to protect their pyramids, and dealing with it was second nature to Bill. Others were not so lucky.
A man detached himself from the group, making towards Bill, who recognised the tall figure and broad shoulders of Kingsley Shacklebolt. The Auror looked grave, and also rather sad, when he gave Bill a brief account on what had happened. The attack had not been entirely unexpected, as the Joneses had always been very outspoken against You-Know-Who, but nothing could have been done to prevent it. "...Hestia arrived barely moments after the curses had set off," Kingsley finished. "She was lucky, I suppose. But her family-" he broke off with a sigh. "There was nothing we could do for them. Now the only thing left is to decontaminate the area and deal with the Muggle witnesses."
"Where is Hestia now?" Bill asked, scanning the surrounding carefully. He could feel the power of the lingering curses, and he was fairly sure he could figure them out. Several years spent in the Egyptian tombs had given him an unerring instinct for the structure of elaborate curse systems and he knew where to look for the sources.
"Lupin took her back to Headquarters," said Kingsley. "He knows what to do."
Bill nodded. Remus was good at dealing with those suffering from shock. It was a knack, Bill supposed. He wondered, vaguely, whether Remus had refined the ability due to experiencing so many losses himself.
The idea was still on his mind when he arrived at Grimmauld Place hours later. The Joneses' estate had been cleaned and sealed, and the Muggle neighbourhood had been combed though for possible witnesses. Bill could hardly keep himself upright with tiredness, but he didn't feel like going back to his own flat. If he was perfectly honest, he wanted to see Remus. And, if he was perfectly, perfectly honest, he wanted to make sure that Remus' offering comfort to Hestia hadn't involved sex.
That idea had begun forming in his mind a few days after the tea time fuck. Bill was no stranger to sexual exploits of all kinds, and he knew that having fucked someone didn't necessarily lead to a better understanding, closer friendship, a relationship or, plainly, more fucking, but it was nagging at him that he so completely couldn't make out Remus' thoughts on that subject. Remus was in no way different that he had been before, showed neither an increased interest nor consciousness nor pointed indifference. In Bill's (not inconsiderable) experience, people's behaviour always changed subtly after they'd had sex; they would behave either more awkwardly or more openly, exchange embarrassed or conspiratorial looks, show a reaction, any reaction. Not so Remus. His behaviour towards Bill was as polite and friendly as ever, and it grated on Bill's nerves. Especially when combined with the lasting memory of Remus and Tonks in the library, back then in October. He hadn't minded it then, and he didn't really mind it now (he could understand their motives well enough), but he could not stop suspecting that Remus had slept his way through the entire Order and that he, Bill, was merely one of many who had been offered that particular form of comfort.
The house was dark and very still. A single gas lamp lit the dim hall, and Bill checked the kitchen first, before directing his steps upstairs. He had no idea what he wanted to do; the thought of invading Remus' privacy was appalling, and he was hoping to stumble across a solution of sorts that would prevent him from exposing himself as a jealous stalker. Especially since he wasn't jealous, not as such. He merely wanted to be sure.
The door to the library stood ajar and the soft crackling of a fire stopped Bill in his steps. He peered inside.
Remus was sprawled in an old squashy armchair, his legs stretched out in front of him, his robe unbuttoned and the collar of his shirt open. His head leaned back against the back of the chair, and Bill's eyes lingered for a moment at the long curve of his throat. The sharp light of the morning sun fell onto him through the tall windows, illuminating his thin face. Bill could see the dark shadow of stubble on his chin, which looked slightly odd, seeing as he had never seen Remus other than clean-shaven before. His arm hung loosely down, the fingers of his hand wrapped around a tumbler of whisky. While Bill was still trying to arrange the different emotions passing through him, Remus' eyes fell open and he looked directly at Bill.
"Good morning," said Remus hoarsely.
"Morning." Bill took one step into the room, and then another one. Remus was watching him approach, his face blank, his posture unchanged. Bill nodded towards the bottle sitting on the table beside Remus. "Mind if I have one, too?"
"Help yourself." Remus didn't move, but as Bill poured himself a glass of Firewhisky, he said with a smile that twisted his mouth but didn't affect his eyes, "Isn't it too early for you to be drinking?"
Bill shrugged, knocked down the drink, put the glass back and sat down on the table. "You're drinking."
"Ah, yes, But I'm... older." Bill knew that that wasn't what Remus had wanted to say. He didn't mind. That conversation was important, and he didn't want to fuck it up right from the start by being too assertive.
"That's why you started drinking earlier," he pointed out. Remus smiled, as though in spite of himself.
"Bill Weasley," he said. "What a quick tongue you've got."
"You know I have," said Bill. He didn't mean it as an innuendo, but there was a sudden flash in Remus' eyes, and, Bill thought, for a moment he looked very much as though he would plunge himself at Bill, but the flash was gone in the next second, replaced by the usual composure.
"I do," said Remus, taking a sip of his whisky. Bill waited patiently, watching dust rise from the shelves and dance in the sunlight.
"What do you want?" Remus asked at last. He had put his glass back at the table, which Bill thought was a good sign.
"Inquire after Hestia," said Bill. "How is she?"
"Sleeping."
"Did you sleep with her?" asked Bill. Remus gave a strangled half-laugh and stretched himself out, positively lounging in the dusty armchair.
"Is that it, Bill? The question everything comes down to?"
"Of course not." Bill shrugged again. "But it's the easiest one to ask." He saw something flash in Remus' eyes again and knew the man hadn't been expecting this. Remus was good at that game, but so was Bill, and he knew that Remus appreciated it.
"I didn't," Remus said calmly. "Would it make any difference if I did?"
"A difference to what?" Bill asked. Remus smiled again, knowingly, and Bill felt found out. Answering a question with a question implied insecurity. He ploughed on. "A difference in my attitude towards you?" And as Remus half-shrugged, he said, almost angrily, "Do you really think I would be offended just because you make your own decisions as to what you do in your spare time?" Remus smirked at the phrasing and, feeling increasingly awkward and hating himself for it, Bill added, "I know you've slept with Tonks. And I'm pretty sure you've slept with Snape - though only God knows why - and I couldn't care less about what you do or don't with any of them. I do however care, very much, about your attitude towards me."
"Meaning what?" Remus had shifted in his chair, and if he hadn't been so angry, Bill would have felt proud about having forced the man with his back against the wall.
"Meaning that I'm not interested in being a pity fuck," said Bill in a very low and very clear voice. "I don't need you to provide... healing buttsex to comfort me. You want to shag me? Fine. But for fuck's sake, don't do it because you feel you've got to make me feel better or anything."
"I don't want to make you feel better," said Remus after a pause. "I want to make you feel good."
All of a sudden, Bill was feeling hot again, but also cold and shivering and helpless, and he decided that it had been a bad idea to drink the whisky after all, because his head had got all fuzzy and was spinning, and there was a weird, reeling sensation somewhere in the depth of his stomach.
"Good," he said, feeling lame and silly. He was looking down on his hand that rested on the table beside his thigh and remembered his urgent wish to see it splayed against Remus' skin. When he looked up, expecting to see Remus' gaze fixed on him, he saw that the other man was looking down likewise, as though avoiding meeting his eyes.
"You're right," Bill said, "I shouldn't have drunk that whisky."
Remus lifted his head to meet Bill's eyes. "Are you unwell?"
"Just tired, I suppose. And drunk." He stood up shakily. "You're a bad influence, Lupin."
Remus stood also, much more gracefully than Bill. He seemed to have full control over his limbs. "You can sleep here. If you like."
"Okay," Bill said. "Thanks." They stood there for a moment, motionless and merely looking at each other across the distance of a few feet. "Which room?"
Remus blinked, once. "Whichever you like."
"Okay." Bill nodded. "Okay."
*~*
When he woke up hours later, darkness was falling outside the windows. He felt relaxed and better rested than he had been in a long time. Little wonder, as he'd just had the longest sleep in what seemed like ages. The room was dim and warm, and it smelled good. It smelled of Remus. Carefully, Bill turned his head and stared at the sleeping man beside him. Remus was curled up on his side, his back to Bill, and was breathing deeply and steadily. Bill could see one bony shoulder, the skin dusted with a smattering of pale brown freckles. The sight of the freckles made him smile; he remembered how he had always hated his, as a child, and how he had learned to grudgingly accept them, as an adult, unable to believe that anyone could honestly find them sexy. But now, watching Remus' freckled skin, he thought he had never seen anything so alluring in his whole life.
He felt especially gratified on seeing that Remus had not bothered dressing for bed. They had taken turns in the bathroom that morning, and when Remus had come to bed, Bill had already been asleep; too many sleepless nights had taken their toll. He snaked his hand towards Remus until it encountered warm skin and moved it down Remus' back. Ah, so Remus did put on his pyjama bottoms after all.
Grinning, Bill rose from the bed and pulled on his robe. It was time for another tea time.
When Bill returned with a tray laden with tea things and sandwiches, Remus was sitting in the armchair by the window, reading. He nodded towards the tray.
"Your mother?"
"Nope." Bill put the tray down onto Remus' bedside table. "I am fully capable of preparing tea and, if I'm particularly inspired, even to make sandwiches."
"I'm sure you are," said Remus, handing Bill the scroll with a sigh. Bill frowned.
"What is this?"
"Kingsley's report." Remus reached for a sandwich and Bill was momentarily distracted by the sight of muscles rippling beneath the skin of Remus' shoulder. He sat down at the edge of the bed and unrolled the scroll slowly, feeling guilty already. The words held no importance for him, not here and now, not when he would have rather drunk his tea and enjoyed the conversation with Remus, before throwing him onto the bed to shag him rotten. He was aware that what Kingsley had to say was more important than his own hormonal urges, but he didn't feel it, and it irritated him.
"Hestia's at the Ministry, then," he said after he had finished reading. "That accounts for the house's being empty." He took up a cup of tea with a sigh, drank too hastily and burned his tongue. He put it back down with a grimace. "I better get going, too," Bill said reluctantly.
Remus handed him another piece of parchment.
"Kingsley slipped in a note of a more... personal character," he said. "Read it."
Lupin,
Don't you dare leave the house tonight, unless it's on fire. You need to rest once in a while and now would be a good time.
Tell the same to Tonks and Weasley, should you see them. Send them home and to bed; they'll listen to you.
Kingsley.
"What a lovely caring man he is," Bill muttered. "All tenderness and affection." He let himself flop back onto the bed, his robe falling open.
"You wouldn't dare disobey a direct order, would you, Weasley?"
"Not if the order is as welcome as this one," said Bill, blinking up at the ceiling. "I think I'm in love with Auror Shacklebolt," he announced seriously. Tomorrow, the realisation of what had happened would strike and he would be back in the throes of war. But tonight, Bill was determined to push away all thoughts of death and destruction and remain lying on his back, staring up at the ceiling, as long as Remus would let him.
The aged armchair groaned as Remus rose from it. He stepped over to the bed, where he remained looming over Bill. The light of a single candle wasn't sufficient to illuminate his face, which remained in shadow, but Bill could see that Remus must have shaved while he had been in the kitchen, making sandwiches and tea. Bill grinned.
"What?" asked Remus.
"You've shaved," said Bill.
"Yes. So have you." Remus' eyes travelled along Bill's exposed body, stretched out shamelessly across the bed, his legs spread out untidily. Bill could feel that gaze burn when it passed his crotch. His cock twitched in the confines of his pants.
Remus was hard, too, Bill could distinctly make out his erection under the thin material of the pyjama trousers which hung low on his hips. A wet spot indicated where the head of Remus' cock pressed against the fabric.
"You look good," said Bill.
Remus laughed. "Hm. That's nice of you to say, Weasley. You don't happen to have any ulterior motives when complementing me?"
"Ulterior? No," said Bill, fully hard now and very aware of it. "Quite superior, actually. Pure, really."
"Transparent," said Remus, staring pointedly at Bill's crotch. When he followed his gaze, Bill saw that the white material didn't do anything to cover his very dark, very swollen cock.
"So," said Bill.
"So."
"There's still something I want to do, you know." Bill didn't know how long he would keep it up. His voice was already betraying him, dropped impossibly low, and he had difficulties forcing his dry lips and tongue around the words.
"Tell me."
"I want to touch you," Bill said. "I want to see my hands against your skin."
"All right." Remus exhaled shakily and then moved over, kneeling on the edge of the bed. One hand came to rest beside Bill's ribs, almost but not quite touching, and the other toyed with Bill's hair, fanned out around his head. "Touch me."
And so Bill did. With a throaty moan, he gripped Remus around the waist and pulled him down onto himself, relishing the way the man's hard body crushed him into the mattress. The skin of Remus' back and sides was cool to the touch, but where he rubbed against Bill, Bill's chest and stomach, he was scorching hot. One hand entangled into Bill's hair, Remus held his head in place, kissing him wildly and desperately, feeding him his tongue and sucking in Bill's in return, and when he opened his mouth a bit more, their teeth clacked together.
Bill was anchored to reality by a few hot spots erupting all over his body: his mouth, burning with Remus' taste, his stomach, where waves of pleasure were blossoming, his cock, ramrod hard and trapped in the hollow between Remus' hip and thigh. Never breaking the kiss, Remus shifted on top of Bill, rolling his hips until their cocks made contact, and Bill could have sworn he felt a magical shock spark through him. He hooked one leg around Remus, and Remus gasped and gasped again when Bill slid his foot between his thighs. It was probably the hottest, most erotic sound he'd ever heard, and he disentangled his hand from Remus' hair and cupped his arse instead. This time, Remus positively groaned, and he bit Bill's lip very hard, before he started grinding himself against Bill. "Like that, do you?" Bill muttered, startling at the sound of his own voice. Instead of an answer, Remus let go of his mouth and began licking a moist trail from his lips down to his jaw, where he bit down, and further down Bill's throat. Moaning so heavily he felt on the brink of hyperventilating, Bill turned his head and arched his throat into Remus' mouth. Remus' hand, still entangled in his hair, was suddenly within the reach of Bill's mouth. His tongue darted out to lap at Remus' fingers, which quivered, and Bill stretched his neck a fraction to suck in Remus index finger. It was damp and salty, and Bill used his tongue to shift the finger into the right position inside his mouth, to push it between his teeth. Remus made a growling sound deep in his throat.
For a brief moment, Remus' weight was lifted from Bill, and he used the opportunity to get his breath back. But in the next second, his breath was knocked out of him again as long, deft fingers curled around his cock and pulled. Bill cried out and bit down on the finger in his mouth. He was rewarded by a sharp intake of breath.
Contrary to what he would have expected, Remus' hand on his cock did not make him incoherent but rather jolted him back to his senses. Bill opened his eyes and fluttered his eyelids to free his lashes from a few stray hairs that clung to them. With a soft chuckle, Remus wiped Bill's hair from his face. "You look completely wild," he said, his voice so thick and heavy it reverberated through Bill's body like the thrumming of the bass drum in a Weird Sisters song.
"You look completely debauched," said Bill, taking in Remus' darkened eyes and his kiss-swollen lips. Remus hair hung in his face, swaying gently with each rolling motion of his hips as he continued grinding himself against Bill's groin. Bill bucked his hips in a wordless attempt to urge Remus on, whose hand had never ceased its stroking motion along Bill's cock.
"You're very hot," said Remus, flicking his thumb over the head of Bill's cock.
"You've no idea." Bill said and gasped at the contact of Remus' rough skin against his most sensitive flesh.
"Want me to go on?" Remus accompanied the question with a very pronounced pull on Bill's cock, who gasped again, clutching Remus' shoulders. Closing his eyes for a moment, Bill gave in to the sensation, feeling heat flooding over him in waves as his balls contracted and his skin began to tingle.
"No," he said at last. "Stop."
Remus let go obediently, and Bill flexed his muscles to flip them both over and stretched out atop of Remus. "Did you vanish my pants?" he asked as realisation dawned. Remus merely smirked. Bill leaned in and licked his lips until the smug smile faded and Remus moaned, hotly, into Bill's mouth. "That's better," said Bill and lowered his head.
"I want to lick you," said Bill, later, after having kissed and sucked his way along Remus' body. His mouth felt slick with semen and saliva.
Remus opened his eyes lazily. "I believe you have just licked me, and very thoroughly at that." Bill could see the pulse point at his throat, the rapid beat flattening even as Remus was speaking, and he pressed his thumb against the hollow at the base of Remus' throat. It was sticky with sweat.
"I want to lick you more." Remus didn't answer. His hand toyed with Bill's hair that fanned out across Remus' chest. Bill waited, patiently, while his heartbeat evened out slowly.
"You've just come all over me," said Remus. "You can hardly want to lick me clean."
Bill flashed a grin. "I don't." He planted a heated kiss on Remus' lips and sat back on his heels. "Turn over," he said, gripping Remus' hip with one hand.
Remus opened his mouth, thought better of it and rolled onto his stomach. Bill sighed at the sight of the long, pale back, gently curved and tapering into narrow hips. He smoothed his palm down Remus' spine, turned his hand over and grazed his knuckles across Remus' tailbone. There was a faint silvery scar at the small of Remus' back, which Bill brushed lightly, before moving his hand further down. He felt Remus shudder as he cupped his arse with one hand, and felt him moan when he swiped his tongue from the small of his back to his shoulder blades.
When he dipped his finger into the cleft of Remus' arse, however, the man tensed ever so slightly, just as he had done before when Bill had tried to insert his finger whilst sucking Remus off. Yet Bill was determined. Wanking Remus and sucking Remus had been exhilarating, but the idea of rimming Remus and fucking Remus made him positively light-headed with lust. Damn the man's trust issues. Bill didn't think he would be able to leave that arse alone.
It wasn't until he had licked Remus' back, the curve of his arse, the insides of his thighs, had left tiny bites along the length of his flanks, that Remus began writhing beneath him, begging, actually begging for more. Bill was hard again, had been hard for what seemed like hours, and his hands were trembling with the effort of holding himself back. His legs were trembling also, feeling as though legions of insects were crawling slowly through his veins, tickling him from the inside, hollowing him. With a sigh, Bill pushed his face between Remus' legs and lapped at his balls from behind. The effect was immediate; Remus came up from the bed with a strangled cry. Bill choked with lust, and when he dived in again, he went straight for the tender flesh in the cleft of Remus' arse. Remus gave a violent jerk and said something unintelligible into the pillow, but he didn't pull back from Bill's tongue which swiped along his cleft very slowly and thoroughly.
His hands clasped around Remus' hips, Bill could feel each shudder that shook the man's body and, growing bolder, he coaxed his hips up a bit to ease access. He tasted sweat, and a sharp taste that prickled on his tongue and went straight to his head, like liquor, and when he dipped the tip of his tongue into Remus, he heard the man give a keening sound which was so entirely unexpected, so unlike Remus, that it almost undid Bill on the spot. He pulled back, panting, until he regained control.
Remus' back was arched and he was trembling; sweat was running down his back, and Bill licked off the drops pooling between his shoulder blades and in the small of his back. He only realised that he was moaning when he saw his heavy breaths stir the hairs in the nape of Remus' neck. Remus exhaled deeply and raised his hips so that Bill's cock came to rest against the curve of his arse. The sight made his head spin, and Bill rubbed himself against the proffered flesh, slid the whole length of his cock along Remus' cleft, saw its glistening head push against Remus' opening and let go of his cock abruptly to push his fingers inside Remus. Holding Remus' hip in a bruising grip, he urged him up to better watch his fingers disappear inside the man's body. Remus' back heaved with breaths that threatened to burst his lungs. He cried out when Bill curled his fingers to hit his prostate.
"Fuck," Bill panted, "fuck." And, a few thrusts later, "Do you have anything?"
"Drawer," Remus managed, and, "Christ!" he added when Bill forced another finger inside him, twisting them to loosen Remus as much as possible.
"Good?" Bill asked, groping around blindly in the nightstand drawer.
"Please."
The slickness of the salve seemed to make his cock swell, and it tingled in his hand as he guided it into Remus, slipping easily past the generously slicked muscle, which tightened around him even as he pushed inside. Bill paused for a moment, giving Remus time to adjust and himself to stabilise his breathing. He didn't think Hieroglyphs boring enough existed that could help him stop himself from coming after merely a few thrusts. But Remus certainly seemed very close, too, and Bill decided that he wouldn't restrain himself and go for a good hard fuck instead. Not that he had a great chance to make it last in any case, not when Remus was shuddering under him, his hands clenching in the duvet, and not when the tight grip around his cock was pulling his orgasm out of him with even the slightest movement he made.
He scrambled into a better position, drew back and pushed back inside, hard, so that his balls slapped against Remus' thighs. Remus groaned and pushed back. Bill shifted to change the angle and this time, his thrust hit right against the spot inside Remus that made him cry out incoherently. Bill wiped off sweat that was running down his forehead and into his eyes. "Can you come from this?" he asked. Remus gave a shuddering snort of laughter.
"Are you kidding?" he said, turning his head slightly so that Bill could see his profile. "How could I not?"
Bill lunged forward, trapping Remus' lips in a messy kiss, stealing his breath. "All right," he said, pulling back. His hands closed around Remus' hips again. "All right."
His orgasm seemed to be torn from the very marrow of his bones, which went liquid the moment his cock emptied itself inside Remus, and Bill crushed down onto the other man's back. Remus, trembling in the aftermath of his own climax, arched back into Bill. Bill closed his arms around him, feeling strangely protective, planted a hot kiss onto the nape of his neck and drifted off to sleep.
He woke up with his mouth dry and his skin itching with sweat and spunk. Remus was lying on his back beside him, looking up at the ceiling, and he turned his head to look at Bill when he felt him stir.
Bill's breath caught at the sight of Remus' flushed face and reddened mouth, and he trailed his fingers gingerly over the man's lips, which curved up in a smile.
"I-" said Bill and coughed.
"There's water." Remus pointed at the table. God, his voice was rough, Bill thought. Almost enough to make him hard all over again.
"You should have woken me up," Bill said when he felt he had regained enough control over his mouth again. Something felt not quite right, however, and, frowning, he raised his fingers to his own mouth and traced his lips.
"Anything wrong?"
"My lips are throbbing," said Bill in wonderment. Remus smiled.
"Mmh." He turned onto his side, facing Bill. "Your mouth looks beautiful."
"You should have woken me up," Bill repeated, and laid one hand over Remus'.
"You need your sleep," Remus shrugged.
"Hm. Yes." Bill fell silent. For a few minutes, he was quite content watching his hand play with Remus', their fingers twining and disentwining, but eventually, he couldn't ignore the worrying thoughts surfacing from the depth of his consciousness and nagging at him.
"What is it?" asked Remus quietly. Bill let go of his hand and turned onto his back with a sigh.
"Hestia," he said. "Her family." He stared at the ceiling for a moment, sighed again, and added, "But that's only the tip of the iceberg, of course. I feel as though we're not doing enough, as though I'm not doing enough. A war is raging, people are dying, and still, I'm lying here, with you, quite comfortable, and quite happy to ignore all the tragedies happening all around me."
Remus, too, rolled onto his back. "You can't think of it all the time," he said calmly. "You need to take a break from time to time."
"I know," Bill said, beginning to feel stupid. Remus had lost much more than he had, and Remus was not going to pieces on him. Then again, he, Bill, had much more left to lose, and the thought frightened him. "I know that I can't. But, you know, I feel as though I'm not committed enough. As though I'm only fooling around, not contributing anything vital."
"You know of course that this is ridiculous. You are contributing-" Remus began, but Bill talked over him.
"Yeah, sure, I do provide some know-how, but. It's only a technical thing. You know? It's not as though I felt any pain. It's not as-" he hesitated and then ploughed on, "it's not as though I have suffered, really, really suffered. I mean, what do I know? Last night, I was pissed off because I was called on duty when I had rather slept. I am irritated because I am no longer in Egypt, enjoying my job and, er, enjoying myself, but have to comb through damp and cold remainders of houses of people who have been killed by You-Know-Who. I know that what I'm doing here is more important than going looking for treasure for the goblins. But I'd rather not be here, and it annoys me. Sorry to bother you with this," he said, rolling onto his side again and giving Remus a faint grin. "I guess I'm just not dedicated enough. I lack the fierce enthusiasm some people have. I'm not Mad-Eye."
"Believe me, I'm glad you aren't. And there is a difference between fierce enthusiasm and single-minded fanaticism," said Remus, grinning likewise. "Fierce enthusiasm, that would be Sirius."
There hadn't been many occasions on which Bill had ever heard Remus mention Sirius. The topic wasn't taboo, but Remus didn't seek it, either, and Bill understood his reserve. He wasn't quite sure just how close these two had been. Oh, he had heard the rumours and the gossip, but he didn't think it was any of his business. If he was honest, he would admit that he was glad Remus didn't want to talk about Sirius, because he wouldn't really know what to say. The eldest brother of half a dozen younger siblings and a people person by nature, he was reasonably good at offering comfort and advice within a certain range. However, he felt he was badly equipped for comforting those whose lives had been substantially shattered and who were facing the shards of their existence. He couldn't even say, 'I know how you feel,' because he didn't. He was alive and well and so, miraculously, was his family.
All those thoughts swirled around in his head, but before he could voice any of them, Remus continued talking.
"You don't have to feel what others feel to be valuable for the Order. The fact alone that you have left Egypt and come back to England shows that you do care."
"I don't think I care enough, though," said Bill. "Most of the time, I'd rather run and never come back."
"So would we all."
"Yeah, but I'd rather run for the wrong reasons. I think." He chewed at a strand of his hair, stared into the darkness and said, "I don't think I'm afraid to die. I am afraid to lose."
"When I was twenty-one," Remus said, "I was consumed by guilt about being the one who was still alive." He gripped Bill's hand and pulled it closer. "It'll fade. You survive and life goes on, poor comfort that it is. There will be losses, and you will lose someone, sooner or later. But you'll survive that as well."
"Unless I won't."
"Unless you won't. In which case we will miss you and mourn you, and move on eventually."
"I really don't know why the girls are all mad about you," said Bill. "You are a wretched comforter, when you think about it."
"Ah, yes. It might be not comfort they seek."
"Careful, mate, my mother is one of 'the girls'."
Laughing softly, Remus rolled onto his front and shifted closer. He laid his arm around Bill's waist, splaying his fingers over his back. Bill leaned in into the warmth. When Remus kissed him, he thought he could distinguish traces of the same taste that had driven him mad while he was sucking Remus and licking Remus and he wondered, briefly, how it was possible for his senses to be still full of Remus and whether it was because Remus' scent had settled in layers all over his skin, filling his nostrils and teasing his taste buds.
"Will you miss me?" Bill asked when they came up for air. He had pushed Remus back onto the pillow, and his hair was hanging down like a long, red curtain, enveloping Remus' face. Remus smiled and wrapped one long strand around his finger.
"Where are you going?"
Under any other circumstances, Bill would not have tried to take that conversation further. But time had become valuable. Tomorrow was uncertain, and his fear of loss included the fear of missing chances. He knew Remus liked him, and he wanted to have something to hold on to in the moment the world collapsed.
"I don't mean to be - you know..." Bill said.
"Eloquent?" Remus supplied, the corners of his mouth twitching.
Bill flashed a brief grin. He shifted and tossed his hair back. Remus was watching him with lazy eyes. Bill raised one shoulder in a half-shrug.
"I guess I just want to know whether..." he paused, looking down at Remus, his head tilted. "How deep this runs, really."
"You've just had your cock up my arse," said Remus lightly. "I'd say that's pretty deep."
"Not to forget my tongue." Bill nodded. "I've had my tongue up your arse as well." He watched the other man for a moment and said, just as lightly, "So that's what this is all about? Cock and tongue?"
Remus blinked and shifted. "Bill," he said.
"That's okay, you know," Bill cut in. "I'm not- I'd only like to know." He turned around and reached for the nightstand. "Want some water?"
Remus took the offered glass automatically. "Bill." He pushed himself upright, propped up on his elbow. "It's just... I am not-" he paused, looking bewildered.
"Eloquent?" Bill smirked. Remus smiled weakly. "It's okay. You don't owe me anything. But, you know," he shrugged. "We are in the middle of a war. I could be dead tomorrow. You could be dead tomorrow." He turned his head to face Remus, watching him intently. "I don't want to miss a chance, if this is what it is."
"I see," said Remus.
"Good." Bill fell back onto the pillow and closed his eyes. "God, I really need to sleep," he muttered. "Unless you'd like to shag some more, in which case I'll be happy to oblige."
"Hm. Maybe not."
"Okay."
"I think I'll just suck you off."
"If that's what you like."
"Very much so."
His eyes still closed, Bill smiled and then sighed when he felt Remus' hand on his chest.
"We can still shag, some time," said Remus against Bill's navel, his breath tickling the fine hairs there.
"Later?"
"Yes."
"Tomorrow?"
"Yes."
"Next week?"
"Yes."
"Can I top?"
"Ye-" Remus broke off and laughed, sending warm puffs of breath towards Bill's - painfully hard - cock. "Perhaps."
"You - ah! - liked it," said Bill, arching up into the heat that had just engulfed him.
"Yes." Remus' voice was rather muffled. "But-" he sank all the way down and pulled back up, trailing the flat of his tongue along the sensitive underside of Bill's cock, "I also rather like being in there."
Bill gasped and pushed down onto the finger. "Be my guest," he said thickly. "Now?"
Remus hoisted himself up and stretched out alongside Bill, his finger still buried up Bill's arse. Bill lifted his head to watch Remus' hand working between his legs, but Remus gripped his hair, forcing Bill to tilt his head towards him. "I don't think so," he said, kissing Bill deeply, luxuriously, lapping at the inside of his mouth until Bill gasped and clung to him. "I'll have you come first." He let go of Bill's hair, and Bill fell back, panting.
"Okay," he said. "Good plan."
"Don't think you're a bit greedy, do you?" Remus was moving his finger inside him very slowly, almost tenderly, as though trying to explore Bill as thoroughly as possible.
"It was your idea." Bill nudged Remus' flank with his knee, until the man was lying between his open legs, their cocks pressed against each other, Remus' weight crushing him quite deliciously. He pulled Remus down into another kiss, relishing the feeling of Remus' cock twitching against his when they opened their mouths for each other. "Besides, it was you who seduced me. You're responsible for me now."
"I didn't see you put up a fight."
"I'm not stupid enough to waste such an opportunity." Bill moaned. Remus' finger was moving inside him again. When he opened his eyes, he saw Remus look at him with an expression of utmost concentration on his face. "What?"
"You might regret it one day," Remus whispered.
"I might. It's worth it."
"All right." Remus kissed him again. "Let's give it a shot then."
The End
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I also enjoyed your attention to their senses: the look of their freckled skin, and how everything sounded and tasted and smelt and felt. Lovely stuff.
Your description of Remus in the armchair drinking whisky was so vivid, I felt like I was in the room! Just as well I wasn't though, might have been a bit of a gooseberry...
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I also enjoyed your attention to their senses:
You know, I always feel I make a poor job at sensory writing, and so it's really good to hear from that you I don't.
Just as well I wasn't though, might have been a bit of a gooseberry...
Both Remus and Bill are rather adventurous in that respect. They wouldn't have minded your presence, if you hadn't minded their taking care of each other as well.
Thanks for your comment! I am glad you enjoyed it.
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And your Remus is undoubtedly the sexiest thing on two legs, how very intelligent Bill is to spot that
Of course he is. Cause, you know, this whole thing is a blatant Remus admiration fic,
with Bill acting the Mary Sue partwhich focuses on all the qualities I love about Remus. Glad you liked it. I'm planning a Bill/Remus/Snape threesome for theno subject
Okay. So. Bill. Ohmigod, I never thought I could find a Bill fic so.. hot. Arghhh! What have you done to meeee?!? (LJ is such a bad, bad thing, I really shouldn't hang out in places like that!)
Maybe I should try to put my thoughts in order?
Well. First off, the library scene: Oh. Yeah. With Hermione as the not-so-secret voyeur/listener, hahahahaa! Poor child! (But I can understand her. Except for the interfering. Oh well, teenagers.. They never know when they are not welcome.) I loved Remus's quick reaction to her approaching them, I could totally picture it in my mind - hehehe.
The next whooaa bit: The scene with Tonks! Aaaaaah! (And that's not a bad 'Aaaaaah!'!) I have to admit I was a bit shocked at first, because I thought the fic might turn into a Remus-leaves-Bill-for-Tonks one in the end, but then I thought naaah, she'd have labelled it accordingly if that were the case, so yeah.. I could enjoy the scene. Meaning I did. But oh, it did have something of a pity fuck to it, so I almost felt sorry for Tonks (almost. Because well, I wanted Bill to end up with Remus; besides, I don't like Tonks very much to begin with, so.. Ah, I know, I'm being mean right now.)
And then Molly. Ha ha ha! You
should have seenwouldn't have wanted to see me, I was laugh-giggling uncontrollably (in that oh-gosh-that's-so-exciting-what-will-happen-next-I'm-behaving-like-a-14-year-old way, hehe).Oh, but why am I talking about the other characters here? Tsk tsk.
So, on to the pr0n:
Uhhhh. Ahhh. glajsdlasdf oijwerf flsjdf (<- incoherent garbling) ......... -- The HOTNESS of it all! Oh my, I really, really loved the sex scenes, I can't even describe how much I did!
You beautifully manage to build up tension, every new paragraph adds to
mythe reader's excitement and ohhhh, your descriptions feel so real!! This may sound silly now, but I loved all the sweat in this fic, I really did. I can somehow understand that many people don't want to read about too many details, that they don't want to read about stuff that can (or does) happen in RL, that they want the fic to stay fictional to a certain degree, but all the sweat and spunk (as well as the taste and feel of it) in here made this fic feel so very real!!!!!!!! Beautiful!(Oh damn, I just realised.. I think I'm only repeating what somebody else already said in their comment above. Duh. Well, I read the comments before the fic, and I'm not good at remembering things in general, so yeah, whatever..)
I'm still not sure if I'll ever like the long red hair (I like the freckles though!! And I especially liked Remus's!!!), but fortunately, you only mentioned it once (and see, you had told me, but I had forgotten about that too..) and it was so brief and toward the end that I could happily ignore it. :)
Conclusion: I am really looking forward to any other Remus/Bill fic you may ever write!!! :D I'm not sure if I can say the same for any other Bill fic (like the one you mentioned above), but Remus/Bill..? - Sure! Anytime! (Give it to me baby, uh huh, uh huh..)
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I am very proud that I managed to convert you to Bill sex. (Even if it's only in combination with Remus. It's a good combination, after all.) I love it when people point out which bits exactly they liked, so thanks a lot for that!
I loved Remus's quick reaction to her approaching them, I could totally picture it in my mind
What can I say? Remus is kewl. (And Hermione might be a slasher.)
But oh, it did have something of a pity fuck to it, so I almost felt sorry for Tonks
Tonks needed it to vent her feelings. And Remus knows what she needs, cause he's like that. Yes, it is a blatant Remus appreciation fic. Why?
And then Molly.
I needed Molly to bring the butter. And the butter crumpets. And the chocolate biscuits. And the interruption served as means to demonstrate that both Bill and Remus are pretty cool and that being almost caught in the act is nothing they're particularly bothered about. Because, hey, they're grown-ups, they've been around the block, they won't get all embarrassed and flustered.
The sex was fun to write. And the whole point of the story, really *g*
This may sound silly now, but I loved all the sweat in this fic, I really did.
I love sweat. There can't be enough sweat, spit and spunk to suit my taste (no pun intended).
I like the freckles though!! And I especially liked Remus's
I like freckles. And my Remus's got freckled shoulders. I should mention it more often...
Seeing as Remus/Bill is my other OTP (to complement Snape/Black), there might be more. But in the near future, Snape will receive some more attention. I've neglected him quite a bit.
Thanks a lot for commenting. It's greatly appreciated :-)
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