Verbatim

[donnaimmaculata]

"I could kill you quite easily, Bella, simply by accident." His voice had become just a soft murmur. He moved his icy palm to rest it against my cheek. "If I was too hasty...if for one second I wasn't paying enough attention, I could reach out, meaning to touch your face, and crush your skull by mistake. You don't realize how incredibly breakable you are. I can never, never afford to lose any kind of control when I'm with you."

If you read those words, what kind of film scene do you imagine to go with them?

a) A romantic moment between two teenagers in love, or

b) A crazy-eyed guy approaching a cowering girl in a dark basement?

I mean, seriously.

Comments

[shocolate.livejournal.com]

Just pick any paragraph from those horrible books, and I end up raging!!

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

I know!

I've half a mind to skim-read the PDFs I downloaded ages ago so that I can back up my occasional* anti-Twilight arguments with quotes, but so far I've found that the Internet supplies me with the necessary quotations quite sufficiently.

*they're not quite as big in Germany, but I know a few people who liked them and a few more who think of "giving them a chance"

[ihlanya.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad I have you guys to point out the crappage, so I don't have to actually read/watch it.

Devon was made to watch it at someone's house and he said he lasted about 20 minutes and then ran screaming.

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

I haven't read them, either, but I enjoy lurking around Twilight-bashing discussions, and I pick up some good stuff every now and then (for a given value of "good").

A friend of mine loosely suggested we should watch the films to "see what this is all about, now that the trilogy is complete". I went into a frothing-at-the-mouth rant about how it's empty of any sense and contents at all and about how I am never going to give them any money, ever. And it's not a trilogy, either. The best is yet to come!

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

c) Twilight--so both!

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

Robert Pattinson and Kirsten Stewart should have played the parts like they were in a movie about a serial killer stalking his victim. That would have been fun.

[hippediva.livejournal.com]

Nothing turns a girl on like accidental homicide!

WOW! Do tweens these days REALLY wanna feel so totally helpless? I mean, can you imagine those words coming from Tony Manero's mouth?

"Yo! I could break yo ass, so don't get in my fuckin' face. Now, let's dance."

I imagine this cuddled in the bleachers during the Thanksgiving HS football game, between large gulps of peppermint schnapps.

[cherusha.livejournal.com]

The scary thing is, it's not just tweens but grown-ass mothers of teenaged girls.

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

Yes! It's like reading (and enjoying) The Little Handbook of Bulimia in front of your teenaged daughter.

[hippediva.livejournal.com]

*SNORT*

[hippediva.livejournal.com]

That goes without saying! Have you ever seen how many adults women are screaming at Jonas concerts? LOL!

I just had such a hilarious image of Saturday Night Fever as a vampire flick....blood on the dancefloor. BTW--I ADORE your icon!

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

Saturday Night Fever as a vampire flick....blood on the dancefloor

That should so happen!

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

Seriously, these are the words of an insane serial killer in movies everywhere! I don't even... I bet there's some sort of justification, such as "Yes, he could kill her, but he controls himself, because he wuvs her, that's what so special about it!"

I kinda think the peppermint schnapps would make the whole experience better. (RPatz certainly looks like he could do with some.)

[hippediva.livejournal.com]

ROFLMAO! I can't fault ANYONE for falling into it. I really can't even though it makes me laugh like a hyena (at my advanced age! *snort*)----I was a RAVENING Dark Shadows fan when I was 13.

There. It's out. My deep, dark secret. I was a Quentin 'ho! So I guess I'd probably be on Team Jacob. ROFLMAO!

Every gen has its 'horrerotica'. I'm just really glad to see that the genre survived Anne Rice! *wink*

Peppermint schnapps in sufficient quantities would make nearly ANY experience of said dialogue pretty interesting! *giggles madly*

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

I've nothing against fangirling dark psycho-pervert characters at all; god knows I've watched Once Upon a Time in Mexico multiple times only because of my deep love for Agent Sands (the best character Johnny Depp's ever played). And I feel a deep and disturbing love for Mr. American Psycho himself, the deliciously disturbed Patrick Bateman. But they should not be sold as perfect boyfriend material, they really shouldn't.

I bet Robert Pattinson dreamed of peppermint schnapps, or any kind of schnapps, really, many, many times during the read-throughs (he was properly intoxicated by the time they started shooting, I daresay).

[cherusha.livejournal.com]

When did vampires all turn into this generation's Fabios? Between this and True Blood, just ugh.

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

I've never been a fan of the vampire genre, but alas, there's no escape from it these days. At least True Blood's Bill is just boring; Edward is an abomination.

*uses vampire icon*

[babycakesin.livejournal.com]

My first reaction when reading this was "those fan fic writers are just weird". Then I realized it wasn't a fanfic but the original! argh.

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

Twilight means never having to say you're kidding

There should be a Twilight/Being Human crossover where Mitchell meets Edward and is appalled and does that impatient groan + eye-rolling thing he does whenever he's exasperated. And then he's got to eat plenty of biscuits out of sheer frustration.

And then has him killed by werewolf.

[babycakesin.livejournal.com]

And then has him killed by werewolf.
atta boy!

[midnitemaraud-r.livejournal.com]

*rolls eyes* The only vampire-related story I've ever liked is Buffy.

One of my friends from high school and college is a Twi-mom or whatever. She LOVES it, and so does her daughter. I popped on to Facebook briefly yesterday, and all of her posts are about Eclipse.

It's not that she's fannish - I mean, who am I to talk, with my own obsessions! :-P - but then again, she's never had good taste to begin with. (Not to mention we caught her stuffing the ballot box to nominate herself for things in our Senior Polls - you know, Most Popular, Best Smile, and other silly superlative-type things. I won Best Car. LOL)

Still, how anyone can find this shit romantic... Oy.

[donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com]

I... really don't care for vampires. In fact, I care about vampires so little that I blank out the fact that the characters are vampires in the two vampire-related shows I watch which I do only because the actors are hot.

I know two people in RL who are into Twilight. One of them is my boss - an otherwise very reasonable, level-headed woman in her 40s. We carefully Never Discuss The Subject.

I'm fine with fannishness, obviously, but the source material should be reasonably good! Twilight doesn't have any redeeming features. Especially if it's taken seriously as a romance.