[personal profile] donnaimmaculata
Some weeks ago, [livejournal.com profile] soawen and I created a monster. It all started innocently (right, [livejournal.com profile] ellensmithee?) enough, with discussions of the different cane varieties and culminated in [livejournal.com profile] soawen's replying to my comment on Hagrid's multifunctional umbrella: "Umbrella Corp?"

To which I replied: "I wouldn't put is past Hagrid to breed zombies in the basement. "Look 'ere, 'arry, if yeh hand 'em the piece of meat like this and hold 'em at a distance with the cane, they can't hurt yeh!""

And so the plot was born.



Soawen: Aided by Snape, of course: "Entry #21: Subjects still not rabid enough, but ability to obey simple orders as 'feed' is beginning to show."

Donna: "Entry #54: Progress too slow. If subjects maintain blatant hostility will have to feed them moron assistant."

Soawen: "Entry #61: Fed them moron assistent. Dumbledore not happy. Will feed them again soon."

Donna: Entry #74: Dumbledore fuming. Potter-incident not my fault. What? I pulled him back before he could lose the other arm, too. Nosy brat.

Soawen: Entry #83: Zombies breed through biting living things? Moron assistent is helping to test this theory.

Donna: Entry #98: Ashamed to say, but: giant moron right. Breeding such fun! Subjects very bite-friendly. Basement getting crowded.

Soawen: Entry 109: As are dungeons. Hate Gryffindor Tower. Want dungeons back.

Donna: Entry #111: Dungeons don't agree with subjects. Humidity increases rotting factor. Found three fingers and one ear on my way to classroom. Note to self: Install subjects in Gryff. Tower and move self back to dungeons.

Soawen: Entry #112: Where is subject 17? Where the fuck is 17?!

Donna: Entry #113: Found 17 lurching in the Charms classroom. No, that's not 17. That's Potter. Why is he lurching?!

Soawen: Entry #114: Moron assistent cannot zip pants un-assisted. Isn't it moron giant's job to care for ... creatures?

Donna: Entry #115: Giant moron assistant let 12 and 76 escape. Idiot! Went looking for them, ran into 76 and Filch, still in shock. Seems subjects learned to zip and unzip pants all right.

Soawen: Entry #121: 12 might be salvaged yet, but 76 is beyound repair. Damn Ravenclaw curiosity.

Donna: Entry #122: Oh well. Will have to breed some more. Subjects' fingers surprisingly versatile potions ingredients.

Soawen: Entry #135: Assign detention to next student seen as self do not want to mop up the subjects' recent hair ball sprays.


Inspired by my boss's theory of Ron's coming back to fight as zombie warrior on Voldemort's side which I mentioned the other day, I searched ff.net for zombie-centric HP fics. There are only four, one of which is called "Zombie Siriusbrain". I feel the fandom could do with some zombie input. (This comment was brought to you by a deadicated Reg Shoe fan.)

Date: 2004-06-15 11:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ellensmithee.livejournal.com
OMG think of the Gryffindors!!!!111!!!!1!!!!111one

I feel the fandom could do with some zombie input. (This comment was brought to you by a deadicated Reg Shoe fan.)

Why do I feel a mega crossover bunny eating its way into my brain?

Date: 2004-06-15 02:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com
Oh, please act upon the bunny, do! I adored your Reg/Igor drabble, back in the Christmas season, and I would love to read more Reg. Or Igor. Or Reg and Igor. They're, like, so cute!!11!!111

Date: 2004-06-15 11:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neotoma.livejournal.com
Donna: Entry #74: Dumbledore fuming. Potter-incident not my fault. What? I pulled him back before he could lose the other arm, too. Nosy brat.


Snape in mad scientist mode is a joy to watch.

Soawen: Entry #112: Where is subject 17? Where the fuck is 17?!


bweee! Draco did look like mini-Spike all through the second movie.

Date: 2004-06-15 02:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com
Soawen was right in suggesting this. Snape could pull off the mad scientist shtick like anything. With Filch as dedicated assistant providing fresh flesh.

Date: 2004-06-16 05:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] babycakesin.livejournal.com
Breeding such fun!
LOL! I should ask things nicely more often *g*

Date: 2004-06-19 11:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] soawen.livejournal.com
*grins* I had forgotten that one. We're pretty funny when we want to, eh?

Have missed you btw :)

Date: 2004-06-19 11:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com
Hilarious!

I've missed you, too! Glad you're back :-) I hope your exams had gone all right

Date: 2004-06-19 02:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] soawen.livejournal.com
I think so, thank you :)

And you? Alive, living, or just there?

Date: 2004-06-19 03:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com
At the moment? Wondering about where the day has gone. I need someone to fix my time management for me, honestly.

Date: 2004-06-20 10:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] soawen.livejournal.com
I think we could be elected as Presidents/Prime Ministers/Princes of the Universe if we promised everyone a Time Turner. I know such a person would get my vote.

I hope you are able to stay on top of it ;)

Date: 2004-06-20 10:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] donnaimmaculata.livejournal.com
Hah! I would use my Time Turner to get more sleep. Endless nights of laziness, mmhh... One endless night, more specifically. Never having to get up and function... I would stick around my Lazy!Self while the other, NormalTimeContinuum!Self would be send out into the real world to earn money.

Is it clear from this comment that I have no idea how a Time Turner works?

Date: 2004-06-20 12:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] soawen.livejournal.com
After reading this I don't care how a Time Turner works. I want this! Endless night, gimme!

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